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New Year Resolutions – yes already….

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Well I’m obviously making New Year resolutions already. Obviously….

Not because I want to though. But because other life stuff gets in the way from starting them now. My favourite (or most commonly used) expression at the moment is ‘When we move….’. All sorts of phrases finish that sentence opener at the moment. We’re hoping to move in the next two weeks but ‘When we move….’ will soon be replaced with ‘When we’re sorted…’, and then with ‘When we’ve decorated….’ and so on and so forth.

So what are these pre-determined resolutions of mine?
Of course my main one is to get back to writing. To start writing again.
The second is what’s on (almost) everyone’s list: to be better. Lose a bit of weight, exercise more, be healthier, be less stressed, do more fun things, travel more….etc etc.
Both these are being pushed further and further into that ever elusive tomorrow. It’s not (just) through procrastinating –  it’s due to other things – I promise.
As tomorrow never comes, however I’ll just have to start it now!
Well at least until after moving house, after my birthday (soon), after decorating the new house and getting everything fixed up to our standards, after a wedding (end of Oct), and then it’s getting everything ready for Christmas – oh wait, that’s right now were basically into new year territory! See what I mean?
I’m not procrastinating (not really) but sometimes – no matter how nice (or heart-breaking) life events and activities are, they really do put a stop to the whole writing thing. Especially when I’m just getting started on a new project. I don’t like doing things by halves. I want to put all my attention into my writing. Starting something new – it’s exciting – but it’s also a lot of work and I don’t want to start by doing little bits and come back to it at a later date and not understand what on earth I’ve written. So I know that I could start writing but I know (and would feel) that I wouldn’t be putting the effort into it that I would want to. And I fear that I wouldn’t enjoy it as much as I know I can do. I want my writing to be a pleasure not a burden. Something that I look forward to, something that I can dedicate some time to, not something that I have to cram into a busy (and rather stressed) schedule as at present.
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Let’s just hope nothing new crops up in the New Year to prevent me from starting writing again. I’m really hoping there isn’t.
I do feel a little guilty not writing. It’s something that I love and something that I’ve promised to myself that I will find time for. It just so happens that that’s not really working out at present.
I’ll just have to say to myself, that no matter what crops up in the New Year (surely nothing can be as hectic as these next few weeks and months), I will write.
You’ve heard it folks (well read it). New Year = writing. I WILL write in the New Year no matter what life throws at me.
It’s been on the back burner for too long already. I will write. I will write. I will write.
I will write.
I WILL WRITE.
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Adult versus ‘adulting’

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A body of one’s ‘peers’

A what’s going on in my life blog.

In July I got my letter informing me that I’d been called up for Jury Service, and so this coming Tuesday it’ll be my first day as a Juror! I’m actually looking forward to it. Well I am now anyway when I first got the letter through I really could have done without it, and was not happy about it at all.

But I thought I’d embrace it as an interesting life experience – and as an interesting fact about me and a story to tell at parties!

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Everyone I’ve told have been pretty jealous and are interested to know more and be a juror themselves. I don’t know anyone who has done it before so it’s going to be even more interesting. I’ve been reading and researching a lot recently about what to except – initially a lot of waiting around apparently; waiting to be assigned to a particular case, so I’ll be looking through my book collection to decide what to read. There may well be a long time to wait so I may as well read the time away. I do have a book to finish but that may not take that long, and so it’s decision time. I’ll be wanting something interesting and engaging, a world I can escape into, but nothing too difficult to read as it may be quite distracting sat waiting with lots of other people in a waiting room. Decisions, decisions.

I’m also back at work after a – not long enough – summer break. It’s nice to get back to work for the people and the routine….Yes that’s right, I’ve been back at work for a week (and one day) then I’m off again. This time doing my ‘civic duty’ as a juror!!

So it’s (hopefully) going to be an interesting experience!!

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I’m Back…hopefully for good (or at least a very long time)

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Right where do I begin?

I’ve started this several times now and haven’t got to the end.

I’ve said to myself that I want to get back to blogging, but that’s writing and honestly my head and my heart haven’t really been wanting to.

It’s been over a year since I last posted.

And as I’ve said, I’ve started writing a new post several times and been prompting myself to write for a while now. It’s not that I haven’t been bothered or that I don’t love writing anymore – I do. I just haven’t wanted to. It comes and goes I guess. Most of the time I would have powered on through this lack of enthusiasm (it isn’t quite that but it’s probably the closest word to it), but it’s been hard. Really hard.

As a family in August 2016, we received some devastating news. A year on and the reality has hit me. I recently lost my Mum to cancer (she was only 62). So throughout her battle I haven’t really wanted to put pen to paper, but I think that I’m starting to now. I’ve started writing letters to her, I hoping it’s going to help me get some thoughts out. From this I think I’m ready again to start doing what I love – writing.

Writing letters to my Mum and blogging again will hopefully led to me being in the right frame of mind to write. I’ve been forming an idea for a new book in my head, which is slowly developing. In fact I even scribbled down some notes about it today.

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So bear with me if my return to my blog is a bit sporadic, I’m hoping that I can promise it will get better. No. I promise it will get better. I can’t say what my blogs will all be about, I’m predicting a large part will be about writing, but other things may crop up.

A blog develops naturally over time. But I guess being away from one so long it will develop unnaturally – and quickly. So it may not be the same blog as it was before. But I’m sure it won’t change too much, but it may read differently. (It may not!) But it is still the same person writing as before, just a different version of me who is still very much emotionally numb, in shock and scarred all at the same time. I can promise one thing though, my blog won’t turn into a memorial nor will it be page after page, blog after blog about me talking about my crap 2017.

Goodbye, for now.

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Summer’s Almost Over

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Well, here in Britain summer never really began. Sure we’ve had some lovely weather days, blue skies, warm weather, but they have been few and far between. Not to say that we’ve had a bad summer vis-a-vis weather. On the whole it’s been pretty dry, fairly warm, but mostly a bit murky and miserable at times. But that’s British weather for you.

Oh and the weather so know’s when its the middle of the week and the weekend, saving all the glorious weather for Tuesdays and Wednesdays, and being pretty disappointing at the weekends.

But I’m not talking ‘summer’s over’ regarding the weather, it has been my first year in my new job where I work term-time. Normally, ever since university I have worked all year round envying those who had the summer off. When my turn came I have found it to be challenging at times. I was a little reticent at first, worried that I wouldn’t find things to do. In actuality I’ve struggled to find the oomph required to do all the things I could have been doing.

That’s the thing about being in a routine. I got used to being in a ‘going to work’ routine, that I was able to maximise my time out of work to fit in all the housework, and of course my writing.

With no routine like this, I had to find a new routine. I’m ashamed to say that I didn’t really find it. Sure I’ve had a lovely time off. I’ve relaxed in the sun – when it’s been around. I’ve met up with family. I’ve done some gardening too.

But that about sums it up – ‘some’. I’ve done bits and pieces of lots of things. Sounds great – but it means that I’ve super neglected my writing. Sure I’ve done some but I hoped and planned that I’d be further along then I am.

I think probably the main reason – aside from pure unadulterated laziness – is procrastination. The kryptonite to all writers. Knowing that I had five weeks off – I thought I had plenty of time.

So I’m looking forward to getting back to my normal routine – that way – even though I have less ‘free’ time to write – I may actually get more writing done.

On the plus side, I have finalised my new publication and it’s now up for download; and after a quick check I have written over 11,500 words. So not bad, but fa from great.

Arrrgggghhh procrastination is a bitch.

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It’s so strange

It’s really quite a strange feeling when something you’ve been working on for sooo long is finally published. It’s all done and dusted with. It feels strange not to be tinkering with it further. Doing further research, reading it through again and again, re-writing, editing, or even just sitting back and thinking about it.

My recently published A Show Called Empire was such a long process and such fun that it’s almost an anti-climax when it was all done. It was such a large part of my writing life that it is so odd that I’m no longer working on it.

I am working on something else – which is lovely – but it was hard to let go.

I may find that time will lessen this feeling of loss [even though it’s a good sense of loss], especially as I get my teeth more and more into my new project.

I’m trying to remember if I felt this way over my first book, a historical fiction story called A Straight Path, but for the life of me I can’t remember. Oh well. As I said maybe time will lessen the loss, or maybe it’ll drive me to keep adding to it – or publishing a second edition or even volume to it. Right now that sounds like a great idea.

But for now I have to wave goodbye to it, send it on its way through the publishing world, so I can allow myself to get my teeth into my new project, a second historical fiction novel.

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Available for Download Now!!

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I’m pleased to announce that my book is now available for download from Amazon. A Show Called Empire looks at the way the British Empire has been portrayed in the movie world and how audiences perceptions and movie-makers portrayals have changed and adapted over time.

I hope you enjoy it!!

What’s next for me?

Why, my next project of course. It’s a new historical fiction book that I’ve just begun working on. In the weeks and months to come I’ll be busy writing and I probably won’t be quiet about it on here!!

Ta Ta for now!!

Lunchtime calls, then it’s back to scribbling down notes, plot and character developments, and writing, writing, writing.